I'm the only gay eskimo,
I'm the only one I know,
I'm the only gay eskimo-o,
In my tribe,

I go out seal hunting with my best friend Tarka,
But all I wanna do is get into his parka,
I'm the only gay eskimo-o,
In my tribe,

Well, me and Nuckfluck Chuckbuck, we both like blubber,
But me I've got this crazy fetish for rubber,
I'm the only gay eskimo-o,
In my tribe,

Ch-k-chss, [Ch-k-chss]

I make a wish on the northern lights,
That I could find a decent pair of whaleskin tights,
I'm the only gay eskimo-o,
In my tribe,

And the seals they sing now:

(ad. lib seal sounds)

These cold winter nights are taking their toll,
I even get excited when I see the North Pole,
See the North Pole...

I'm the only gay eskimo, (only gay eskimo)
I'm the only one I know, (I'm the only one I know-ho-ho-ho)
I'm the only gay eskimo,
In my tribe,

(spoken:) Now like the proclaimers would sing it:

(sung:)I'm the only gay eskimo, (only only only only)
I'm the only one I know,
I'm the only gay eskimo,
In my tribe,

(spoken:) Like Bob Dylan!

(sung:) I'm the only gay eskimo
I'm the only one Iiiiii know
I'm the only ga-yyyyyyyyyyy eskimo

(spoken:) Like Ric Ocasek from the cars:

(sung:) I'm the only gay eskimo, (oh, oh-oh, oh-oh)
I'm the only one I know,
I'm the only gay eskimo,
And she used to be mi-i-i-i-ine,

(spoken:) Like Oasis!
I'm, the only gay eskimo!

(various noises, fight in background)

(spoken:) Like Van Morrison:

(mumbled in tune:) There only is one,
I aint seen it come out on street and (mumbles)
'n Jesus Christ fits in there somehow as well...
..and the crack was good,

(sung:) Well I'm the only gay eskimo, (only gay eskimo-o)
I'm the only one I know, (only one I know)
I'm the only gay eskimo,
In my tri-i-i-i-be...