I'm your enemy, and I'm your friend

I'm your punch-bag as night-time ends

I'm too much, then not enough

Baby, I'm your bit of stuff

Previous loves, you may have found

They left you on stony ground

But I'll make full your loving cup

Baby, I'm your bit of stuff

Your hair's unkempt and it's greying

Your gut's hanging over your jeans

All of my friends agree on one thing

You're hardly the girl of my dreams

They can't see what you saw in me

And mine can't see what I saw in you

A mystery to all your friends, I'll always be

And all my friends, just like all yours, ain't got a clue

The perfect man's out there somewhere

Fair of skin, full of hair

Don't kid yourself, just give up

'Cause baby, I'm your bit of stuff

Your eyesight and hearing are failing

Your stretchmarks have spread to your feet

Each of my family members you met

Assumed you were out on release

They can't see what you saw in me

And mine can't see what I saw in you

A mystery to all your friends, I'll always be

And all my friends, just like all yours, ain't got a clue

You're my Bonnie (I'm your Bonnie)

I'm your Clyde (You're my Clyde)

You're the one I'll (You're the one)

I'll die beside (I'll die beside)

Go tell the others (Go tell)

Competition's tough

'Cause baby, I'm your bit of stuff

Previous lovers

Have come and been

Haven't liked just

Just what they've seen

You're enigmatic

You're off the cuff

'Cause baby, you're my bit of stuff