Well, you fumbled in the foyer with a lawyer
Then you kissed your psychiatrist
You took off your clothes and jumped into a fountain
With a Certified Public Accountant

You took a gift from a Greek
Every day last week
And you ran your hands up and down
His Greek physique

Chorus
Why, why, a thousand times why
Don't you love me
No matter how hard that I try
Oh why, a thousand times why

Then you were off to the races with a racist
Holding hands with a handy man
You went to an ice cream social
With and ice cream socialist

I've got a love so true
And it waits for you
But I can't get in
And I can't get through to you

Chorus